Scoozis. Textbook Ordinary.


My first post for The Drunken Tomato, my moment in the spotlight!  I’ve known the Drunken Tomato herself for years, and when she asked me to contribute, I was flattered and happy to oblige.  So without further ado, let me take you on a magical adventure of finding a Bloody Mary in British Columbia. I was in BC originally to visit my brother, who found himself a Canadian bride and moved north to this interesting land, but I also had met a beautiful woman at his wedding and spent the majority of my week with her in Vancouver.

I took in the sites, rode bikes through Stanley Park, and did other such touristy things.  All the while, though, I was mystified by the disturbing lack of alcohol providers.  I’m a Portland native, so I’m used to just having to turn around to find a bar.  Not the case in Vancouver.  I found myself zig zagging up and down the downtown area in seek of a bar multiple times.  I later discovered you can’t even buy beer or wine at a grocery store, you have to go to the liquor store for all alcoholic consumables.

Not cool, Canada.

When I told my Canadian friend of my desire to drink a local Bloody, she suggested we look up who actually serves one in town, to avoid further street wandering.  Sound advice, as even a google search revealed only a handful of places serving them.  Most reviews referred to it as an American cocktail.

My hopes waned as the first two recommended places proved to be closed the day we were going to get brunch.  Yet I persevered, and so it came to be that we found ourselves at Scoozis.

Right in downtown, it seemed like a good choice.  The reviews were good, although mention of bloodies were rare (though this was true of everywhere I looked up).  Still, I was in good company and spirits.

These spirits waned, slightly, as the waiter gave me an unusual look when I ordered the Bloody.  I mean, yes, the internet had recently taught me that apparently a Bloody Mary is very American, but it was on the menu!  Can it really be that rare an order?

Apparently, yes, yes it can.  It arrived, and beyond being light on the garnish, it was light on flavour.  It was very mild.  It was certainly a bloody mary, by textbook definition.  In fact, the preparer may have just looked up how to make it in said textbook.  While everything was technically correct, there was no wow factor, no unique flare or special spin.  I felt like it was just on the menu to get tourists looking for a Bloody through the door.

And otherwise, getting through the door isn’t a bad thing.  The french toast was delicious, and the staff was very friendly and fun.  Which made me feel all the worse, knowing I was going to not be delivering them a favorable (favourable, in Canadian.  I picked up some of the language while I was there) review.  They even gave me some sort of delectable apple pastry as dessert for free.  Let it be know, I’m a sucker for free food.

I give them two and a half celery stalks.  In reality, that last half a stalk is coming from the staff being awesome, not the Bloody itself.

What I learned about Canada?  Not a land for drinkers.  Apparently, all the liquor they imported to the states during prohibition went unnoticed by the general populace.  Disagree with this?  Good!  The only thing I like more than free food is being proven wrong!  Tell me where to get an amazing Bloody in Vancouver and I will review it on my next trip up!

Again, 2.5 Celery Stalks for Scoozis technically accurate Bloody.

Scoozis 445 Howe Street, Vancouver, BC V6C 2X4.  T: (604) 684-1009.

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