LAVA Bloody Mary Mix. Simple Extravagance.
I am currently 17 hours and 50 minutes into the audio book version of Fifty Shades of Grey, and if I hear another reference to my inner goddess or mouths shaped in hard lines, I just might lose it. For the life of me, I cannot figure out why or how or, no really, why on earth this book became such a hit. I mean, it can't be the whiny, self-concious, emotionally fickle main character. And it can't just be the gratuitous sex scenes. And unless I've been seriously missing out on life, it can't be the unbelievably virile main beau with a stunning ability for pumping out rapid fire orgasms.
But one thing is for sure, a renewed sense of sexual enlightenment has dawned on us, and regardless of whether the book actually sucks, and it does, we have it to thank for the now abundantly available Fifty Shades branded vibrators, BDSM gift sets and over-priced riding crops. So to keep with this sexy theme, I'd like to share a very special bottled bloody mary mix with you.
I'll start by saying, if Christian Grey drank bloody marys, he'd be drinking LAVA Bloody Mary Mix. This is not your ho-hum, everyday bloody mary. The box itself exudes elegance, invoking a sense of excitement and anticipation for the lavish inner surprise. The bottle is sleek and sophisticated, and the whole package even comes with a set of disposable coasters.
Hand-crafted in small batches, the mix uses premium ingredients, imported spices and whole juiced San Marzano tomatoes grown on volcanic soil in Italy. In other words, it's fancy as fuck. Foregoing a more traditional recipe, the strong tomato base elicits a savory, almost meal-like flavor. Think home made tomato soup or a fresh pasta marinara with just a hint of spice and a black pepper finish. Relying heavily on the San Marzano tomatoes creates a simple, but prominent single note flavor that is clearly of exceptional quality.
However, where the drink excels at highlighting the main ingredient, it lacks in any added complexity. Pairing this mix with a cucumber or basil infused vodka or perhaps even a different type of liquor would add more depth and enhance the tangy tomato flavor. Contrary to what the name might suggest, the consistency is smooth and slightly pulpy, and when added to your favorite liquor, becomes light, fluid and perfect for a warm weather brunch.
With its $14.95 price tag, this luxury bloody mary mix fits squarely within the splurge category. But what a splurge it is. So get your boo, a bottle and have damn sexy night of bloody mary fun.
LAVA Bloody Mary Mix is available for purchase through their website.
3 Celery Stalks
Post Script: If you really want a raunchy good time, check out the book Adult Video. It's like Kevin Smith's Clerks but set in a porn store. No really, it even says that on the Amazon page.
Also, please welcome the newest member of The Drunken Tomato family! I fully expect him to pull his wait around this bloody mary operation. ;)
***I received one or more of the products or services mentioned above for free in the hope that I would mention it on my blog. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”